kodeeman said: That's awesome! What did you major in?
English, with a Creative Writing focus. I also completed a minor in Mass Communications
What am I doing to myself?
"My darling, you are allowed to fail without being a failure. You are allowed to make mistakes without becoming one. More opportunities will present themselves, you will find hope again."
The problem with depression is
-You know you’ll be ok, but you still feel awful.
-You know people love you, but it doesn’t feel like they do.
-You know doing something will make you feel better, but you just don’t know how to.
-You want to be well, but you just can’t seem to get there.
SOMEONE SAID IT
"Oh, how could I call the one who taught me to love when I wasn’t loved in return a mistake? How could I choose to forgo the lesson that to love another meant to sacrifice self? Lament…him? No, I could never."
Diamond Kathleen, Haunting (via thewine-darksea)
"When you meet someone who tries their hardest to stick by you regardless of how difficult you are, keep them. Keep them at all costs because finding someone who cares enough to look past your flaws isn’t something that happens every day."
Midnight Thoughts (I got lucky with you)
kodeeman said: You go to USF? Thats awesome
I am a proud Bull! I graduated a semester early in December of 2013
I want him, of all people, to deserve me. All he would have to do is try. Show me something. It’s easy. But he doesn’t, because he doesn’t care. One day, I’m not going to pick up the phone. One day, I won’t crawl back. One day, I won’t make the initiative. One day, I’ll be done.
"You left me once. How do I know you won’t leave again?"
His point is valid—and brutal, at that—so it stings. You squint and cowardly nod. “You have a point,” you tell him, “but I won’t. That’s why I’m here now.”
You don’t tell him that the thought of leaving creeping up on you again is your worst fear. You don’t tell him he’s a horrid lover for failing to see that his scabbing, unwelcoming heart is the sole reason you have or would ever leave him in the dark.
Instead, you fight for him. You revert back to the girl you were months ago, waiting by the phone; dancing atop him on his mattress. Freezing and naked under the whirling fan.
You don’t tell him when you’re curled up in the bathroom alone, during another night of disappointment & his phone gone straight to voicemail, that he’s hurting you worse than he ever has before. He knows what is was like to lose you, and even still, he doesn’t care to keep you.
He has not given you a reason to leave, but to run.
"You can’t look at a girl like that and expect to come out unscathed on the other side. Girls like her are the sound of clanging cymbals and shattering plates. She would have you tear your own chest open as you frantically try to offer her the most vital pieces of your being in your dying breath. And the cruelest part? She’d take them."